Only 8 more days before I see my fam – and you know what that means:

This  past week has been ridiculously busy for me.  As the end of the year rapidly approaches, there are looming deadlines at work as well as last minute items to attend to before I hop a plane and head home for the holidays.  For these reasons, and probably a few others that I can’t quite remember, I admit to slacking off on providing the freshness that is Monday Motivation to this blog.  Instead, below is a posting that I originally did for blackandmarriedwithkids.com earlier this year and that I’ve provided for your reading enjoyment.  This subject also became a topic of conversation on an impromptu roadtrip with a friend recently.  Anywho, don’t say I never gave you nothing 😉

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One of the original Boy Bands!

Due to my age I am admittedly a little behind the general population when it comes to my love for the music group ‘New Edition’.  I love them, can listen to their music for hours on end, and even sat front row during their reunion tour (and yes, that included Bobby) a few short years ago where I was handed a rose by Johnnie….swoon!  Fandom aside, I can definitely appreciate any artist who puts out music with quality lyrics.  One of my favorite New Edition songs happens to do just that.  ‘You’re Not My Kind of Girl” relays the sentiments of a man who encounters an amazing woman, yet can honestly admit to himself that she’s just not his kind.  The chorus goes a little something like this:

            Sorry, you’re not my kind of girl

            You’re the kind of girl that a man’s dreams are made of

            Sorry, you’re not my kind of girl

            You’re the kind of girl that a man would be proud to call his own

How many of us can relate to the above?  During my dating tenure, I can say that I have met some amazing men, from all walks of life, all of whom I believe are great people and some of whom I have been able to remain friends with to this very day.  All of these men have redeeming qualities about them, were hard workers, providers, were family oriented, educated, and the list goes on and on.  Now I know what you’re thinking – if these guys were so great, as I’ve claimed they were, then why didn’t it work out between us?  The answer to this is simple, they were just not my kind or vice versa.  Compatibility is a quality that I find important, and when dating I try to pay close attention to how compatible he and I are.  For example, I’m a pretty goofy person who tries not to take myself or life too seriously, and can easily find a couple hundred things to laugh about on any given day.  Someone who is more serious may not be a good fit for me.  Also, I’m pretty out-of-the box, abhor routine and enjoy trying new things.  A man who enjoys following a strict pattern when it comes to life may not be a good fit for me.  Notice the emphasis that I’ve placed on each of those statements as I don’t believe there was anything inherently wrong with that individual.  Instead I can be honest in admitting that while still amazing he may be better suited for someone else.  The same can be said for me, as I understand that not every man may find my dry humor and acerbic wit attractive…and that’s ok 😉  Acknowledging that you’re not someone’s kind does not mean that you’re no one’s kind, or that you need to change anything about yourself – quite possibly you haven’t met the right one yet.

I like to use the phrase “There’s a lid for every pot” to illustrate the point that there is someone for everyone.  Now, this isn’t suggesting that we should not continually look to improve ourselves and become better people – because we should and independent of our relationships status.  But I am suggesting that you are enough, just as you are, and the right person will appreciate you – all of you.  So get out there, have fun meeting and interacting with new and different people while learning about yourself in the process.  Because you never know…you guys might just click, and end up singing & practicing the choreography to another New Edition song together – with matching leotards* and all 😉